I Don't Know What to Say
by hamuka
Summary: Exactly what the title says. A parody of Gumball/TV shows in general/fanfics in general/myself and a random dumping ground of ideas that I won't be able to complete, littered with complete and utter insanity. Rated M for safety. WARNING: Quality isn't guaranteed.


**A/N:** **Hello there, everyone!**

**Um... I still don't know how to start an Author's Note. This time, however, I have a legitimate reason: I really don't know what to say about this story.**

**Well, I guess I could start with a short summary, like in my other fanfic.**

**This is, first and foremost, a parody. A parody of Gumball, fanfics in general, some specific kinds of fanfics, movies, and a self-parody as well.**

**Secondarily, this is a fanfic where I will put the ideas that I'm not able to make into fanfics of their own right, for different reasons ranging from "not enough time to work with it" to "too insane". So, read at your own risk.**

**Thirdly, because of the second reason, this can be considered a place where you can go to gain inspiration. (That is, if you can understand the stories at all, which will not at all be easy. Sometimes, I don't fully understand what the heck I'm writing either.)**

**And now, what won't be included:**

*** - (Nothing.)**

**...Yeah, this fanfic will contain everything. I mean, everything you can think of. Really.**

**Anyway, let's stop talking and do some walking, as someone in Youtube Rewind 2013 said, and LET'S DO THIIIIIIIIIIIIIS**

**(Also, don't worry; my other story, The End of the World As We Know It, is getting a new chapter as well. Soon.)**

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><p>It was a Tuesday afternoon. I honestly have no idea what anyone thinks about that time of the week, but after a 10-second search on Google I found that that's an even more hated day than Monday, so I guess we can go with that.<p>

Gumball and Darwin also felt grumpy that day. Gumball even went as far as grabbing Darwin's legs and shaking them when he woke up. "What are you doing?" - "I'm trying to strangle you even though you don't have a neck!" - "Dude, is it that dream where I kissed Penny again?" - "How'd you know?" - "You had that dream once already. Don't you remember?" - "Well, now that you mention it... Whatever, I have to be grumpy for some reason, just like you. It's in the script." He waved a piece of paper. "Hm. It's Tuesday today." - "...That works."

They went down to the dining room, slapping the breakfast in their own faces, before going away. Anais, who was sitting at the table then, along with Richard, spoke to her dad. "I think someone needs a hug." Richard immediately hugged his daughter, before she angrily replied. "Not me! Them!" He put her down, looking at his sons, who were opening the front door and slamming it repeatedly. "What's up?" he asked, to which Gumball answered in a grumpy voice. "It's Tuesday!" - "I see... Do you want a hug?" - "There's no point. Everything on Mo- I mean, Tuesday's crummy!" - "What about a Wonder Hug?" It was Darwin's turn to respond. "What's that?" - "It's filled with all the love and happiness in the world!"

The blue cat was suddenly struck with realization. "Waaaaaait a minute." - "What's wrong, Gumball?" Anais said, overhearing everything from the table. "I think we've had a conversation like that before... Exactly like that." - "And?" - "And I don't think it ended well." - "Could you please hurry up?" Richard said. "I don't want to be late for my first day in my new job." - "Wait. Since when did you have a job?" Darwin asked. "Since I called a hotline of Fervidus Pizza Delivery, which turned out to be for job application..." - "Okay, now I remember as well." Anais said. "How did that one end again?" - "I dunno. Something with the tearing apart the universe, whatever that means." - "...Seems about right."

"But why is everything repeating itself?" Gumball asked, clearly concerned. "I have no idea what you're talking about," Richard said, "but I'll have to go to work soon, so you better get ready for school or you'll have to walk there!" The kids sighed, finishing their breakfast before sitting in the car.

* * *

><p>The next time the kids met was after school, on the street. "So..." Anais started, "how was your day, guys?" - "It was terrible!" Gumball said. "First there was gym class, where I soaked the entire floor in sweat during the push-ups. Then, in the library, I found out that there were two videos about me failing on the internet, both of which had a high viewcount. Someone apparently found the video where I failed at dancing, and reposted it, along with the one where I saw a screamer." - "Yeah, I have no idea who could've done that." Darwin said, whistling afterwards. "Me neither. By the way, speaking of Darwin, he fell in love with a fire hydrant a few minutes ago because it had a pretty dress on it, then sneezed so hard that it flew away." - "...That explains the new water fountain." Anais answered, looking at the column of water emerging from a hole.<p>

"The weirdest thing of all this is that everything today has happened in the past already." Gumball said. "Darwin's allergy, him falling in love with a dress, the two videos becoming major hits, gym class..." - "I think the author's trying to compress as much of the series as he can into a single chapter of a fanfiction." Anais said, deep in thinking. "...And what can we do to stop this?" - "Well, if we comply, and repeat as many of the series' past scenarios in as little time as possible, we might satisfy the writer and his need for a sufficiently insane writing, which means he would end the chapter early on and reset the fabric of the universe, as if nothing here has ever happened." The two boys' response was just a confused stare. Anais tried again. "If we do as many of the things we have already done as we can, we can stop this." Since they still didn't understand, their small sister decided to speak in terms they can understand. "Repeaty things feely good." - "Ah." the kids said, finally realizing what the rabbit was trying to tell them all along.

"Now, Gumball, you go home and bully everyone you can on Elmore Plus (especially Hector), before hacking into Mom's e-mail and sending an message to Daniel Leonard. After that, get Kenneth from the fridge (you know, that sludge monster) and put him in the microwave. Don't forget to dig up Dodj or Daar as well. Then go to Laser Video and Ripley 2000, and buy A Pony's Tail, Alligators on a Train, a cell phone (an old, brick-like one), and a video game that doesn't fit in your console. Break the Alligators DVD, and ask for a refund for the game." - "Got it!" Gumball said, writing everything up in a notepad which has appeared out of nowhere.

"Okay. Darwin, you go back to school, ask for an aptitude test, and give it to me when we first meet again. Then find Bobert and play the betting game with him. After winning the bet, find Sarah, and ask her to stalk-" - "**NO.**" Gumball interrupted, with a shocked expression. "**DON'T.**" "Yeah, that would be weird even for this story. Instead, just find William and act around him like you normally would; ignore him, so he gets annoyed. Don't forget to sneeze all over the place; the more damage, the better. Then get the cellphone from Gumball and text Ocho." - "Alright!" Darwin replied, writing into Gumball's notebook.

Anais nodded. "While you do all this, I'll call Mom, and ask her to buy a remote for the TV, and to craft a new chart so we can try to reach for the stars again. Then I'll get some tinfoil and craft the lucky helmet, before painting down the family and giving it to Principal Brown, along with the filled-in test Darwin will give me. Then, I'll go to everyone I know and tell them that we don't have any rules in the house." She wrote down all these things into her own notepad.

The kids then sat down on the sidewalk. "All this planning made me really hungry." - "Too bad we don't have any food." They collectively sighed, just before Richard drove by, changing reality and with that, transforming the notebooks into sandwiches. "...You know, maybe this story isn't all that bad for us." Gumball said, before biting into his sandwich, happily.

* * *

><p>But of course, he was wrong. Completely wrong. Because heaven forbid anything good happens to anyone in this fanfic, ever.<p>

The next time they all met was two hours later. Anais and Darwin were running along the streets from an angry Hector, who was busy throwing away houses, when Gumball came out of Ripley 2000, the DVD and video game in his hand. "How's everything going?" Anais shouted to Gumball, trying to make herself heard through the giant's rampage. "Pretty terribly! In a good way, for us at least!" Gumball answered back. "Kenneth has escaped the house after the neighbors and everyone else came in the house and started to play Dodj or Daar. I also went away and bought everything you need. Here's the phone, Darwin." He stopped talking for a second, throwing the brick-o-phone to his brother. "Anyway, a few minutes, and everything should go completely insane. How about you?"

"We've also done some weird things." Darwin answered back, still texting Ocho. "Mom's went home to put the chart up and try out the new remote. I guess she'll also be really angry that we let everyone in the house. We gave the aptitude test and painting to the principal before annoying William to the point when he started using his telekins- teleknies- telephone- whatever, moving stuff around-skills against us, I won the betting game against Bobert, then I sneezed and wiped the entire school away." - "So that's why everyone is falling from the sky." Gumball said, before Anton landed on the concrete face-first, falling to little pieces, not moving anymore. "...Is he dead?" - "I guess so." - "Whatever, he'll be back in a few minutes, or the next chapter. Whichever comes first. Let's go!" Gumball said, running away, and crushing Anton to even smaller crumbs than before.

As they ran, Hector followed them through the streets, causing destruction as he went. Before he reached the trio, however, a now-giant Kenneth moved towards him, causing a fight. Meanwhile, Darwin's face became a bit distorted. "A-a-a-aaaaCHOO!" He sneezed, sending the two giants flying through the air, before Richard moved past them with the motorcycle and shrinked them to the size of ants, before the Eiffel Tower fell down and crushed them. "Really now?" Gumball asked, still running. "This is the USA, not France!" Richard then turned around, realizing he went in the wrong direction, moving past the Eiffel Tower and turning it into the Statue of Liberty. "That's more like it." he nodded, before running towards the house.

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><p>Their home was being renovated by the neighbors, who were watched by a furious Nicole, as excepted. The kids decided to spend no more time near the house, and ran backwards instead. However, their dad was also driving by, making the entire street move along with him, thus making the house follow the kids. "Seriously?" Gumball asked aloud. "Darwin, do you have to sneeze yet?" - "Not really, but now that you mention it, I-i-a-a-aaaaaaCHOO!" He sneezed, making the entire house go on its way towards Japan. Except it didn't, because it got stuck in a time loop, moving across the same few metres along the sky.<p>

"All done, miss!" they heard a construction worker inside the house say. "Can we play this board game now?" - "**NO! GO AWAY!**" - "...B-b-but miss, we can't move out! We're flying!" - "**YOU WILL BE FLYING IF YOU DON'T WALK OUT RIGHT THIS INSTANT!**" - "I'm telling you, we're in the sky!" - "If we're in the sky, then how come that I can do **THIS?**" Nicole said, as she stepped out of the house, falling down before a flying car moved below her, sending her back up a few seconds before it got crushed by the school, which fell down in its entirety. A few seconds of relative silence followed, before Nicole started talking. "...You know, maybe we should really play that game. What is it called again?" - "...Dodj or Daar. Some kind of Japanese game or something." - "Sounds fun." At this point, the children realized that they needed to go before the game's side effects destroy them and everything in their vicinity.

As they moved away, though, they were stopped in their tracks, as the clouds started falling down, transforming into concrete, crushing everything in their path. "Uh oh!" the trio collectively said, before a cloud directly above them also transformed and fell in their direction. Fortunately, Darwin had to sneeze again, so he turned his head downwards (he couldn't turn it upwards, or he would've risked being crushed), and released.

* * *

><p>They couldn't hear anything afterwards. Maybe because they were deafened by the blast; maybe because everything and everyone went up into the air, themselves included, and nothing slammed into eachother or the ground anymore, while the others stopped speaking from the shock. The former is more likely by statistics. But either way, for a moment, everything went completely silent.<p>

Then they fell back.

The three children tried to grab into everything that was nearby. A camping chair, a BBQ, even a towel. Finally, all of them tried to grapple into the same thing: the chimney of a nearby house. And in fact, that could've worked... if their dad didn't land earlier, his landing changing every rooftop into bacon, making them crash full-force through it and into the floor. The floor of their own room.

The kids, after pushing themselves up, unscathed from the several thousand metres-long fall, decided to climb down from the rooftop. They still had no intention of playing the game, whatsoever. So, they decided to climb down a ladder that just so happened to be next to their window, and ran away again.

Every step they took brought another level of craziness with it. Bus stop signs turned into lollipops and frying pans, while the road turned into quicksand. Drawing style turned around every once in a while; first steampunk, then mosaic-like, 3D, cubism, and claymation. Construction workers ran around with burning legs during snowfall, while randomly assigned pieces of Bobert's combat form shot lasers all around, redirected from a series of cars, their windows acting as mirrors, setting off a forest fire which unleashed a swarm of monsters who in turn got turned into ice sculptures from a shockwave that turned the burning trees into candy canes...

Then I had to take out the trash, and forgot to click the "Save" button before closing the tab, erasing everything that just happened from existence.


End file.
